Law Office of David G. Harding

TRUST

Sometimes, we find wisdom in unexpected places.

Several years ago, I found myself working on a long-term volunteer project with possibly the most disgusting narcissist I have ever met. He was being paid handsomely, but there was never enough for him and he happily harmed anyone to get any small thing he wanted. He even tried to blackmail me once. It was pretty funny.

He once said something that seemed obvious at the time, but that I will never forget: “The most important thing in hiring an attorney is trust.” At the time, I thought this was such a simple, basic thing that it did not even rate a response. I just added a flair for stating the obvious to his long list of flaws and symptoms.

Since then, I have seen and heard a lot, discovered how rare real trust is, and learned how people react to being trusted and to being able to trust. I often receive money for clients; the first time I turn it over to a new client without deducting “carrying charges” always surprises, as though grabbing a little for myself would have been somehow more natural or expected.

Mostly, we only trust those who appear simple until someone who isn't very bright rips us off. Then we trust no one. Most of us accept that we are going to get clipped now and then. We just hope we don't get violated in any big way, even though we know from experience that a little thief is a just a big thief waiting for a big opportunity.   

The opportunity to break trust pops up all the time. At least seven times, opposing lawyers have offered to refer me work in the future if I would talk my clients into settling. One clown recently offered free advertising for me as part of a settlement. The problem is that EVERYTHING coming out of a settlement belongs to my client, not me.

Once upon a time, attorneys and clients trusted each other routinely.  Shreds of that tradition still exist. For example, there is attorney-client privilege, under which an attorney and a client are deemed to be the same person. If a client cannot be forced to reveal something, then that client’s attorney cannot reveal it.

Otherwise, trust has been reduced to an empty word. “You can trust me” means very little now, because there is a price to be paid for being trustworthy, and very few people, lawyers or not, are willing to pay that price. That price is simply passing up advantages and opportunities that could harm those who trust us.

I trust my clients and my clients trust me. They know things I don't and I know things they don't, but we don't worry about it, because we don't chisel each other in small ways or large. I would not suggest for a moment that you should walk through my door trusting me without reservation, but we should soon learn to trust each other.

And at the end of the day, we can laugh together at the untrustworthy. They always seem to end by doing something loudly and ridiculously foolish.